Try it yourself: the Church Sign Generator!

Ahoy there, and all that.

Take the Dante’s Divine Comedy Inferno Test

“Lustful”? Moi?

May 25 (today, that is) is Towel Day. I don’t have one with me right now (though I’ve used a couple during the day ), but, since we’re honoring the great, late Douglas Adams, I want to show you his interview with American Atheists (mentioned, incidentally, in one of this blog’s earliest posts, almost 2 years ago). Douglas Adams’ interview is as brilliant as it was years ago — and the world is less fun (both in the humorous, and in the adventurous sense) without that guy in it.

Thinking about a guy like this makes me wish there was some kind of afterlife, since I’d give anything to ever talk to the man. Unfortunately, wishing doesn’t make it so… and accepting that is what makes us adults instead of children.

It’s been some years, but… So long, Douglas, and thanks for all the fish.

As I said, it’s not just an article for laughs, like most of them in Uncyclopedia are. This one is actually a “useful” guide (“useful” if you really wanted to start a religion, that is), and suggests how most common religions were actually created.

I’ve actually thought about creating a religion some years ago, but a “joke” one. Maybe I’ll do it someday.

The author is anonymous, so I have reproduced it in the forum. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. And if it makes you join the forum, so much the better.

Warning: this one is a bit … let’s say, for laughs. While I believe it, I’m also aware that if someone was telling it to me, I’d begin to think that he or she was going a bit too far, maybe “losing it”… So, please, don’t take it too seriously.

One of the big differences between individualism and collectivism is that the former believes in individual responsibility, where the latter doesn’t.

For instance, if a man becomes a criminal, individualism says it’s his own responsibility, while a collectivist will say it was his “environment”, his “upbringing”, his “genes”, or, in a more general way, “society’s fault”.

Conversely, if a man brilliantly succeeds in some field, a collectivist will say that he was “lucky” to have such opportunities, or such an education, or something – while the individualist position is that that man is responsible for his own achievement, and has a right to be proud. (that doesn’t mean he didn’t have help, but it would be actual help (such as the parents who took care of him as a child, the teachers who taught him, a partner who worked together with him), not “his environment”, or “his upbringing”, or some other crap.)

Now, let’s move to a completely different field: the heating in an open space office. No, really, bear with me.

I work in an open space office, and it’s winter here. Lisbon, in winter, is not incredibly cold (it never snows here, for instance), but you certainly can’t go out without some layers of clothing.

Now, the office here is heated up. Commonplace, right? But it’s collectivism in action – instead of each one doing what’s required for him or her to be comfortable, “the system” does it for everyone – whether you like it or not, since anyone who ever asks to lower the heater is treated as an evil selfish monster.

Furthermore, people seem to believe that the room shouldn’t be just as warm as a warmer winter day. Oh no. They heat it so much that it’s only comfortable if you’re wearing spring, or even summer clothes. Short sleeves and such. Now, who ever leaves home wearing those… in winter?

And it’s not that way just in offices. In Portugal, any shopping center, in winter, is so freaking hot inside, that people have to leave not only coats, but wool shirts, and possibly even long-sleeved shirts in their cars. What about those who don’t come by car? Tough luck. The “people” have spoken, and the people want everything summer-hot.

Am I just weird? Or is it the world that has gone insane?

I’d prepare for those locusts if I were you…