(this is expanded from a comment I wrote in the entry below this one)
A lot of people believe that love is causeless. That it is unexplainable, that it has no rhyme or reason, that a person simply loves another and that’s it, that it’s impossible to say “I love you because…” or “I love you for your…”.
Many go even further and say that, even if it was possible to say that, it would be undesirable, because it would ruin the “purity” of love, that love should be causeless. That loving someone for something, that loving something in another, does, in some way, diminish the feelings, diminish the meaning of “love”.
Call me weird, but I believe feelings do have causes. You may not think about it consciously, you may not even be aware of those causes, but you fall in love with something (or things) in the other person. Their sense of humor, their intelligence, the way they make you feel alive, the special smile they have just for you, their passion for life, etc.. “Love without cause” is for teenagers 
, or for when both people are so “low” that they can’t find anything to love in the other… and yet they are OK with it, because they know there’s nothing to love in themselves.
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Na escolha da amada, o homem revela o seu fundo essencial, a mulher, na escolha do amado. O tipo de ser humano que preferimos revela os contornos do nosso coração. O amor é um impulso que emerge do mais subterrâneo da nossa pessoa…
O amor é… escolha pela sua própria essência. E como nasce do centro pessoal, das profundezas psíquicas, os princípios selectivos que determinam essa escolha são, simultaneamente, as preferências mais íntimas e as mais misteriosas que formam o nosso carácter individual.
Ortega Y Gasset
Sorry about the excerpts in Portuguese, but I really think they’re valuable for the discussion in question.
Can you, please, add a translated version?
Definitely love is not causeless, in none of it’s forms, either we are talking about being in love with live itself… in my opinion the main prerequisite to be able to love something or someone else… love is the true color of live… but most of the humans are “black and white”…
“Show me a smile then,
Don’t be unhappy, can’t remember
When I last saw you laughing
If this world makes you crazy
And you’ve taken all you can bear
You call me up
Because you know I’ll be there”
by Cindy Lauper
The translation of the above would be something like the following:
When a man chooses a woman he reveals his deepest inner self and a woman reveals it when choosing a man. The type of human being that we prefer reveals the nature of our heart. Love is an impulse that emerges from the inner depth of ourselves.
Love is choice for its own essence. Since it grows from the personal core - from psychic depths - the principles of selection established by that choice are simultaneously the most mysterious and intimate preferences that shape our individual character.
Ortega y Gasset
Thanks.
Welkies.
now the other day me and a friend had an argument about this very topic while she believes that love is something that of course has a logical cause. though she is glad for it she truly doesnt believe in “LOVE” as most people know it. This is my argument you see the fact is the reason im reading this topic is because i myself think i am experiencing it.Sadley she moved for job purposes. but yet i still look up this blog for som reason to explain why it hurts so much worse than with anything else. and truly i think people have opinions yes that is true. but isnt it crazy to think that every question has a solution? i believe love is one of those, im not saying we cant explain psychologically why we experience it but the question has to why our body deems it neccesary for us to need it? i mean seriously think about what purpose love serves our species any benefit at all and it makes u question whether love has a logical and proven explanation for such.
well after all “what do i know about love im only a 16 year old” ^_^
you will find as you look back upon your life that moments when you have really lived are the moments when you hav done things in the spirit of love. love can never be explained , a feeling that cannot be controlled …love is such a mystery it can hardly be spoken of…
Explaining something in no way ruins it’s purity.
Explain that a diamond consists mostly of highly pressurized carbon all day, it won’t change the fact that it’s not an easy substance to destroy.
Though I must say that explaining love is something people try to do every day, and just can’t. The best explanations of love are probably some really good writings or songs now.
But they’re not actions… which would be the best explanation of it, that happens every day. Not cheating, acting altruistically towards a person, there’s probably a million ways to “say” it.
Still, I’d agree that it has a cause. What doesn’t?
Perhaps it’s such a hard thing to explain because it’s different for everyone. Therefore explaining your love may make sense to some but none to others.
nour bou nader:
[quote post="25"]you will find as you look back upon your life that moments when you have really lived are the moments when you hav done things in the spirit of love. love can never be explained , a feeling that cannot be controlled …love is such a mystery it can hardly be spoken of…[/quote]
Though most of this I would agree with, I think that speaking of Love is something not only possible, but not done enough.
Having a cause does not make something logical. Irrational causes are still causes, and quite often emotions such as love do fall into the irrational or at least non-rational category by their very nature.
Causation and logic may often be found together, but they are not identical.